I finally had to allow the question lurking in the corners of my heart, mind, and womb to surface. "What if I can't have children?"
I was approaching thirty. I had read the articles and the question, "When are you going to have children? You're not getting any younger," was something I had been hearing more often (seriously folks, just stop asking people that question. It's rude and frankly, nonya business.)
My chances of conceiving were declining according to everything I read. My family history sure as hell wasn't reassuring. Hysterectomies due to heavy, painful periods that resulted in anemia. Premature ovarian failure. Fibroids. Not exactly the picture of optimal fertility.
While I didn't have any definitive proof I would experience infertility, I didn't have a guarantee that I wouldn't, either. And it was that uncertainty that left me unsettled and fearful.
I like to know what's ahead. It gives me a (false) sense of control. And there's nothing I like more than to feel like I'm in control, completely in control of my life, my body, and most certainly my fertility.
I knew I had to do something to overcome my fear of infertility. So I faced it head on. Below are the three steps I took (and continue to take) to get back the peace and confidence I had lost.Read More